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Tuesday, June 21, 2011

The day that keeps on giving

This is very rare… two posts in one day. I am typically lucky if I fit one in.

Wondering what could possibly be so important that it warrants two posts in a day?

Well, it all began last night...

10:45pm: I am exhausted and fed up enough I shut the kiddos TV off. (yes, I am the mom who lets her kids fall asleep with the TV on. Go ahead judge me. I do.)

Around 11:00pm: (the last I looked at the clock) the hubby and I feel asleep lying on the nursery floor. Probably long before the kiddos because just before I shut off the TV, they were showing no signs of going to sleep.

12:00am: I wake up, body aching from sleeping on the nursery floor, mumble a couple of swears words under my breath as I try to pry my fat ass off the floor. I wake the hubby doing so. Jackson is soundly sleeping. Addison stirring. We creep out of the room so not to make any noise.

1:15am: finally we lay down in bed.

2:30am: Addison wakes crying. Take her potty and settle her in between the hubby and me.

4:00am: Jackson wakes crying. Change his diaper and settle him in between the hubby, Addison, me and a dog or two.

5:30am: Hubby’s alarm goes off.

6:00am: wake to the hubby getting ready for work- he is late and being excessively noisey.

6:15am: wake to the hubby loudly shouting “No! Jackson!”

6:30am: force my ass out of bed.

The day greeted me with exhaustion. Poured my first of many cups of coffee and turned my "off duty" sign to “on”.

Looking forward to naptime- which for Jackson thankfully came early today- I put both the kids in bed and settled down in their room waiting for them to fall asleep. Jackson did with in minutes. Addison, never did. She woke Jackson within an hour and started dozing herself. My thought: she sure as hell not taking a nap if I can’t; especially after waking her brother so soon. I woke her and decided we would take the dogs for their walk than have lunch.

Made lunch, Jackson devoured two bowls of pasta. Addison took two bites and with that said ”I am not eating, I am not hungry.” Not in the mood to play games, I told her she was sitting at the table until her lunch was finished. She did just that… well, until she fell asleep, at 5pm.
I figured I would leave her and wake her for dinner. A few short minutes later I hear “I am not hungry mommy. I am not eating. I am mad at you!” She picked up exactly where she left off.

I told her to go potty. While doing so I started the potatoes for dinner. When a few minutes passed and I did not hear her call for me, I decided to check. She was peeing with the toilet lid down and Jackson standing on the lid behind her. I stood there briefly, in amazement, turned around and walked out to laugh… which is a good thing because laughing kept me from completely loosing it. (I have come to understand what it really means)

I went back into the bathroom; asked what the hell she was doing. “Oh, I so sorry mommy. I don’t know.” Clearly half asleep and no way to get her to stop midstream, I place towels around to catch the rest off the run off. When she finished, I throw her in the shower and run out to grab something to clean the pee from around, behind, along side, the lid and between the seat of the toilet. Upon returning this time, I find Jackson in the shower, completely dressed, with her.
I dry them, put Jackson in a dry diaper and tell Addison to put on new unddies. Deposit the kids on the living room floor, and get back to making dinner.

Just then I hear a sound. A sound I recognized immediately. Run out to the living room to find Jackson pulling out our very extensive DVD collection.

As I am cleaning up yet another mess and hoping dinner is not completely burnt, the hubby walks through the door. At this point I am a very cranky mom… I turn to him “the next time you decide to wash the blender/ food processor blade, could you be so kind not to leave the blade facing up, so that I may avoid another prick.”

Oh and I woke up with a huge zit on my chin. La-dee-fucking-da!


Lindsay said...

I have a huge one on my cheek. And my kids were extra bad today. I feel your pain. lol

Lindsay said...

P.S. Mentioned you on my blog, hope that's ok with you. : )

mommysankey said...

Thanks for the mention Lindsay!

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Anonymous said...

I *LEARNT* alot from this post too.. Really I did...LOL! Love the look on your son's face "what? I should be in here too!" So great you could laugh at the pee episode. Not so sure I would be able to.

Anonymous said...

I *LEARNT* alot from this post too.. Really I did...LOL! Love the look on your son's face "what? I should be in here too!" So great you could laugh at the pee episode. Not so sure I would be able to.

mommysankey said...

well, excellent platform beds- so happy you *learnt* so much from my shitty day- If there is ever anything else you need to "learnt" please feel free to stop by.

mommysankey said...

I had to laugh. By this point I was seeing red... laughing kept me sane. The way she said "oh sorry mommy. I don't know" she was so sweet then I tossed her in the shower (half asleep) clearly mother-of-the-year here.

The Nerdy Nurse said...

Ok, I know you're intent wasn't to be funny here... or well, at least not entirely, but I find myself giggling uncontrollably at this.

I am with you on the have to laugh bit. I often find myself cackling like a crazy woman in order to avoid crocodile tears and blazes of fire blowing from my core.

Your kids sound entertaining, and without the excitement, life would surely be boring right?

I'm your kid actually makes it to the bathroom to potty, mine just stands in front of the toilet, grunts, and thrusts his pelvis forward.

Oh to be a man...

mommysankey said...

@The Nerdy Nurse- I chuckled at the image of your son grunting in front of the toliet. The things I have to look forward to. Yes, Addison, in most cases, makes it to the bathroom. My life would surley be boring if not for the kiddos- they can be entertaining... but seriously thank goodness for wine :)

MommaKat said...

Whew- with days like these, bedtime seems so distant. Happy to hear you made it through with a sense of humor. Good work momma!