On this particular day I decided to head over to my moms with kiddos in tote. She wanted to see them before we left for the weekend.
On my way to the house I had a thought… I can leave the kids with her and run out and get a pedicure. A very long and overdue pedicure. I hate spending the money and time on something for myself, especially when I can spend it on the kiddos. I digress.
This way Friday morning I am not rushing out to have it done before leaving.
I get to my moms and run the idea of her watching the kiddos for an hour. She has no problem…
“Never mind, I will just go Friday morning.”
She asks “why?”
I retort “I have not prepared my feet.”
She was clearly confused “what do you mean prepare your feet?”
For me (a stay at home mom standing bare foot on hard tile floors) prepping for a pedicure is much like prepping my hoo-ha for a pap smear.
I have to do it just right…
The night prior to any pedi, I soak my feet, shave off any calluses, file down the evidence of my botched shaving job, lotion my feet and keep them in socks overnight.
My only hope is that I do not take too much dead skin off. I do not want to be obvious and certainly do not want to have nothing there when they come at me with what appear to be ancient torture devices.
I decided to go anyway.
And everything was glorious as usual about the whole pedicure foot bath experience...
That is until the women giving me my pedi started to use that giant chain saw looking machine to scrape the 3 pounds of dead skin off my heels... It became a presentation as she came from the back carrying this giant cheese grater. She had it stretched across the her palms of both hands as she walked back to my chair. She held my foot about her eye level and began to grate my calluses. I sat there in disgust as I watched the dry skin fall four feet to the floor. I was mortified as other women sat, staring mouth slightly opened, in disgust. I turned to her "Just another part of my body ravaged by my children."
At least my toes look glorious and I feel three pounds lighter.
